Recent Dual-Degree Graduate of Virginia Tech, Boys’ State Alumni, Loses All Hope Sitting in Childhood Bedroom on January 6, 2021.
As news and videos of the day’s riots at the Capitol Building in Washington D.C. reached Jesse Reynolds as he sat in his parents’ house 150 miles south of the riots, he barely felt anything.
“It didn’t really surprise me, but I guess it was the last straw?” Reynolds, 22, reflects quietly. “I once wanted to become a public official.”
The sudden hopelessness became clear to Mr. Reynolds at some time between 2PM and 4PM, just as the reports from Washington came in. The loss seemed inevitable in retrospect, according to Reynolds. Optimism for the young man is expected to be unavailable for the foreseeable future, assuming trends hold.
Reynolds’ personal resignation to despair has obvious underlying causes; the inescapable depression due to more than a year of global, domestic, and personal emergency barely overshadows Reynolds’ contempt for “an impassible hedge of ignorance and presumption” he sees fixed in American society at large.
When asked to elaborate, the recent graduate cited the comment sections under select Instagram posts covering the day’s violence. To Reynolds, no provision for counter-arguments, understanding, or mercy was given between radically different viewpoints presented in the platform’s abbreviated lines of discourse.
“It’s like we’re all living in different realities. If you’re [a Trump supporter] then you’ll hear this story in one way, and if you’re [a Democrat], then you hear this story a completely different way.” According to Reynolds, these different realities have made constructive dialogue virtually impossible.
“What’s scary is how we can outright deny facts. The president does it, the news can do it, I do it, my parents do it. It’s impossible to discern what you can trust anymore, and that’s as dystopian as it gets.”
The math is simple, according to the Virginia Tech alumni, who made it as far as Math 1014 in college. “Half of our population believes that half our population is stupid or mislead. How likely is it that either side is correct?” Shaking his head, Reynolds continued, “The second you start thinking that you’re better or more legitimate than another person, or if you believe that their opinions are illegitimate, then you’ve already declared war on democracy, and I guess you’ve also become kind of a jerk. We’ve got a lot of jerks out there.”
“I was voted to be a delegate in Boy’s State for my city, MacArthur. It was so much fun — democracy seemed so great and exciting at the time, you know? I once wanted to be a public official because of that. Now, I think I’d rather do anything else. If people don’t want democracy, don’t want dialogue, then what’s the point? This country is starting to seem hopeless.”
Reynolds is outspokenly a Christian, however he declined to identify a personal denomination or church. When questioned in respect to his faith, Reynolds’ comments on the day’s events accompanied an even more defeated demeanor.
“We are supposed to be peacemakers. We are supposed to — seriously, what would Christ be doing right now?” And later, “I’m just so embarrassed and angry about how Christianity has been turned into a platform for Trump, and how so many people I know have fallen for it. If you strip all the little arguments away, it’s just so clear that a non-believer has figured out how to corner Christians into his boat.” Abortion politics alone, Reynolds asserts, has made it difficult for most Christians to escape supporting Trump.
Although Trump identifies as a Christian, Reynolds disagrees. “He is on record many times saying that he does not repent of sin. He could believe the entire Bible, but if he doesn’t repent, then he’s not a Christian.”
Reynolds was questioned concerning his own presence on the National Mall several months prior to the riots at “David’s Tent”, a Christian worship campaign which has been strongly associated with evangelical Trump support.
“It was amazing personally to be there [at David’s Tent] at the time,” Reynolds recounts. “But it was so hard to navigate. On the one hand, we’re supposed to worship together and let that transcend everything, and yeah, that was actually really good, but on the other hand….”
“So many lies have invaded the Church because of Trump. Deceived people kept walking into the tent in their Trump hats and shirts. And I felt so strongly in the moment that I wanted to just confront them… But I still don’t know how to do that right. All those people are probably even deeper in the deception now, and they’re serving their idol thinking it’s their duty.” Multiple times throughout the interview, Reynolds asserted that Trump was an “idol” for many Christians.
“I’ve got friends and family who are stuck idolizing a proud liar. I’ve got Christian friends who I know stood in the Capitol yesterday. And I still don’t know how to approach them.” A sense of confusion pervaded many of the half-conclusions the young graduate approached. “Do I try to make peace and smooth it all over? Or do I confront them and question their supporting Trump? And how do I do it without making my own opinions seem holier than theirs? It’s so hard to figure out, and I’ve already made so many mistakes.”
Reynolds was asked directly how the nation or the Christian church at large could recover from the disastrous state he perceives. His response:
“It would take a change in the hearts of a lot of people who have ignorance and hate hiding in their hearts. No one can really see the hate in their own lives, but that’s where being a Christian comes in — we’re supposed to point out our weaknesses and forgive each other at the same time. I can’t force that to happen on a large scale, though. You’ve gotta know Jesus.”
Later: “You’re asking the wrong guy.”
Focus on any one issue steadily dissolved as the interview dragged on, and the young man’s already frangible state turned from agitated to morose, and settled into a resigned stillness.
“I really used to admire this country, but if it ever really was worthy of that, then it isn’t anymore.”
Updates can be expected as the situation develops and on the 20th of January.
